Stupid Freakin Girl Scouts

This little bitch is Satan in disguise.

When I began this blog, I forgot about Girl Scout Cookies. I really believed that there was nothing I couldn't live without (cheesecake, ice cream, licorice, pizza) but last week I was proven wrong. I forgot about Girl Scout Cookies. But they did not forget about me.

So last week, things started off pretty good. I wasn't babysitting overnight anymore, so I was able pick my own menu once more. I ate fish 3 times last week. I packed my lunch for work. I even took my mom's dog for a freaking walk (which I don't do very often because she's pretty spastic and not so great at cardio-friendly walking). Then, I woke up on Wednesday with a pinched nerve and shot the whole thing to hell. Tag-a-longs, and Thin Mints, and Samoas, oh my!

Here's what I've realized this week. I cannot continue to life with excuses. All I do is make excuses. I have 101 reasons I can't make it to the gym, but not one of them is good or true. If I do not do something about my weight, I will live the rest of my life restricted by it. I think there is a fine line between telling myself that I am not defined by my body and deluding myself into believing that I'm not really all that big. But the simple truth is, I am extremely overweight. Like, I think I fall into the 'morbidly obese' category. That freaking sucks and I don't want to live this way anymore.

So I'm setting practical, achievable goals for myself. I want to loose 8 pounds in the next 4 weeks. In order to do this I am going to make it to the gym 4 times a week and at least two of those times will be in the morning before work. I MUST go once on the weekend and once on Wednesday (those are my easy days and I always use them for sleep instead of exercise). And I'm taking measurements so another goal is to have lost an inch from my bust, hips and waist within 6 weeks.

Also, I want to be down another pants size by May. Now, this will mean I have to start wearing pants (I'm on a skirt/dress kick), but I think I can handle that. I have LOADS of jeans just waiting to be worn in storage. And if my friend Jenny can go to actual boot camp, then I can go to the fake kind. Once I am able to run for 10 minutes straight on the treadmill, I will sign up (I'm thinking July for this).

So there they are. My goals. I invite you to ask me about them and call me on my bullshit if I act shady, okay. Don't forget, I am a recovering liar and honesty is still hard for me.

Anniefesto 8.0

It's late. I suck. I know. Sorry.

Ambitious

It is costly to love me, just so you know.  I will ask/demand things of you that you might not care to give.  But you will give them to me anyway because I will ask so politely.  Trust me, you will.

I've been kicking around this idea in my head for a couple weeks now.  I'm not quite ready to share it, but I think it's going to be spectacular.  It will involve me, you and my video camera.  And if you love me, you'll do me this favor.  Even if you don't love me, just like me somewhat, you might be interested as well.  

My long ago dreams of being a filmmaker are reemerging and there is a lot of creativeness juice in my brain (that's what I call it, so back off).  I'm not talking about the Oscars here, just a little creative outlet that will give me to opportunity to combine two of my passions: Facebook and Friends (the people, not the show).

Anniefesto 7.0

Positive thinking, positive thinking, positive thinking. That is my mantra today. I'm about as spread thin as I can be right now and it's taking it's toll on me physically, mentally and emotionally.
If anyone has an extra $500 and wants to take me on a Caribbean vacation come April, it would be welcome. I swear, all I need is a bed, a towel and my drink ticket. I'll stay out of your way the whole time. It will just be me, my SPF 100, a trashy novel and a bottle of wine out there on the beach. Oh, and my iPod so I can listen to Coldplay and pretend Chris Martin is there with me, offering to braid my hair and massage my....

Anniefesto 6.0

Prepare yourself.  This video is freaking long and there is a LOT of rambling.  Also, an editorial note.  Subconcious = Unconcious.  But as a bonus, I've added some background music.  What do you think?  Is it oddly placed and distracting?  Should I keep looking for more appropriate music?  Do you hate it and wish I hadn't spent all that time messing with my iMovie program?  Be honest.  Let me know how you feel.  Don't worry, I can take it.  

Cry Me A River

Before you watch the attached video, I wanted to say something.  When I started doing the whole blog thing, I thought it would be all good times and bad jokes.  My intention was to post pictures and stories about my life as a nanny that might be funny enough to make some of my friend laugh and then subsequently tell me how funny and gifted I am, but whatever.  And things went according to plan until the end of last year when I reached a place where I knew I couldn't go on pretending like life was all rainbows and pony rides.  I made the decision to improve my life and to begin to live it to the full.  I broke two HUGE addictions in my life (diet soda and cigarettes) at the same time and a week later started back with Weight Watchers and exercising.  I know some people might say that way too many big commitments at the same time, but I figured that I was ready and to continue abusing myself for even one more day would have been wrong and dishonest.

And so, the Anniefesto journey began.  I thought it would be genius to have a more streamlined focus for my second blog, hence the 'talky blogs'.   They have been great fun to put together, even though I'm still learning how to use all the bells and whistles on this new laptop.  Not to mention the fact that you guys seem to be embracing my new way of expressing myself with incredible generosity and love.  So all in all, Anniefesto is blessing me in ways I never imagined and I believe it will continue to do so.

All that being said, I just want you to know that while I am most comfortable cracking jokes and telling pointless stories, there are days when I just can't seem to conjure a smile.  I have ups and downs, just like you.  And if I am going to share my highs with you, I am also going to share my lows.  Please don't feel like you have to 'fix me' or check up on me when I post maudlin videos like to one below.  I mean, I'd love to hear from you, but I do not expect any of you to save me from myself or anything.  I just want to invite you to share in this, the most crazy, exciting, terrifying, insecure, proud season of my life so far.  Thanks for being a part of my story!

Anniefesto 5.0

I'm not very happy with this particular video because I made it while I was rushed, so please forgive it's lameness. Also, please forgive my gross double chins as they seem to be the star of this particular show. I think I'm gonna have to find a new angle to record these v-blogs from. I wish I could fit my laptop into the medicine cabinet in that bathroom so I could get me some of that great lighting, but I tried it and it was a disaster. Oh well, enjoy the show (even though it sucks a little)!